climb here, climb there, climb climb everywhere.

& so,

2011-06-09T03:46:00.003+08:00

it felt nice to have u near by my side.

even for awhile, even as friends.
but this little corner inside me wants u back.

goshhhhhhh. & we all thought moving on was easy.

well, my prayers are with u tonight. hope the back won't give u mucho problemo.
take careeee.

p.s. i have to train real hard. my fingers are like baby's.

"Caraphernelia"

2011-03-29T23:06:00.000+08:00

Sunshine, there ain't a thing that you can do that's gonna ruin my night.
(But, there's just something about)
This dizzy dreamer and her bleeding little blue boy.
Licking your fingers like you're done and,
You've decided there is so much more than me.
And baby, honestly it's harder breathing next to you, I shake.
I brought a gun and as the preacher tried to stop me.
Hold my heart it's beating for you anyway.

What if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
None of the colors ever light up anymore in this hole.

Nobody prays for the heartless.
Nobody gives another penny for the selfish.
You're learning how to taste what you kill now.
Don't mind me, I'm just reaching for your necklace.
Talking to my mom about this little girl from Texas.

What if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
None of the colors ever light up anymore in this hole.

Just give her back to me.
You know I can't afford the medicine that feeds what I need.

So, baby, what if I can't forget you?
(What if I can't forget you?)
Collide invisible lips like a shadow on the wall,
And just throw, oh no.
You can't just throw me away.

So, what if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
What if I don't even want to?

Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh.

What if I can't forget you?
I'll burn your name into my throat.
I'll be the fire that'll catch you.
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
None of the colors ever light up anymore in this hole.

Just give her back to me.
You know I can't afford the medicine that feeds what I need.
So, baby, what if I can't forget you?
(What if I can't forget you?)
I'd better learn to live alone.

What's so good about picking up the pieces?
What's so good about? What's so good about?
What's so good about picking up the pieces?
Oh.

been a long time.

2011-03-29T23:04:00.001+08:00

hello blog!

idk why i'm here. let's just say i miss the old times. how things used to be.

2010-07-27T02:01:00.002+08:00

been a long time. haha. i really need someone to talk to. haha. just to spend time with, just to crap, just to make me smile.

i feel like shit right now. like seriously.

honestly, i never felt as if i was needed anywhere. everybody got their something else, and i, will only have company when anyone else needed one.

i never felt important. when i was captain for both schools, it felt great. it felt as if i was needed. then came the hooligans, who were really a great bunch of people to be with. and also climb.republic!

but now, everybody got their own cliques, and partners, and i felt like, i was nowhere. and i am no longer the captain too. i am on my own now.

i just want to feel wanted, to feel needed. i want to feel important, to something or better still, to that one special person. that is all i wanted to.

about u, i have nothing to say.
i just hope u will call me back.

i feel like shit, have always been. i need the wall.

happy birthday sayang!

2010-06-13T00:00:00.002+08:00

happy 18th birthday nursukashi erliana!!!

hope you enjoyed your birthday presents.

may you have an enjoyable day today. furthermore, I will be back in singapore today!! yayyyyy~ miss u syg.

a bit more ok! i know you have alot to tell me. hees. you bet i tga tak sabar nk balek ni! heeeeee.

back into your arms. i can't wait.

enjoy today ok! so time will fly past so fast, that before you knew it, i am right beside you, as per usual. ((:

love you syg~ have a great birthday ok.

p.s. just so you know, my flight back to singapore would be PR 505, lands at 11.15pm. ((:

save up.

2010-05-03T01:59:00.003+08:00

i want to save up.

nopes. not for me. but for us. to go:

Petriti, Corfu
to see the weathered pier.

but at the rate i'm going now, it will take YEARS for us to go there. ):

money.

2010-04-27T00:41:00.002+08:00

suddenly. just suddenly, i felt the sudden urge for the need of money.
i want money. lots of it. lots and lots and lots of it!

i feel so miskin. ):

$_$

2010-04-18T23:58:00.002+08:00

i think, everything in this world, every little things, runs on money. money makes the world go round, money gives u food, shelter. & to a large extent, i am starting to believe that money can buy happiness.

seriously now, i need money.

next "looked forward to" date: 19 May 2010.

actually it will be tomorrow, because i will be meeting you. (:

2010-04-12T02:47:00.002+08:00

recently, life have had a great turn up.
i was expecting the days to be worst, but things get well, and in fact, it turns out great!

time spent with you were never regretted. you, hold a special place right here. *points to my heart*

and also, i have been real busy with work, and *top secret* haha.

looks like *top secret* needs to wait a little bit longer as i missed out on an important thing.
after top secret is done, wooooooooo! hahahaha.

also, school is going to start real soon. new classmates. hope they are not the type which is too serious. *cross fingers* but then again, i don't think that will happen.

err, i'm real tired right now. i really think we need a fan right here in the living room. like seriously.

okies. time to rest for awhile. training's tomorrow.

nights readers.

2010-04-03T17:21:00.002+08:00

no more tagboard.

because i don't really care what ppl have to say.
:P

lol.

it's just that these days, i am in a "do-whatever-you-want-to-do" mood.

every little thing.
because when u depend on others to make u happy, it's a bit hard.
depending on other sources except yourself would most probably with disappointment.

i do miss this kind of mood though. because i believe, everything will turn out alright.

there.
done.

promise.

2010-03-29T23:47:00.002+08:00

this would be a promise.
a promise not to any other person.
a promise not to you.
a promise to none other than, myself.

this would be a promise to myself.
to control all these energy in me, all these angst & emotions.

a promise not to make ur life seem sad,
a promise to myself.

i would remember it. i can do it.

i'm strong. i can kill of anything.

even my thoughts, emotions, and feelings.

watch me.

2010-03-28T03:07:00.002+08:00

dear Nursukashi Erliana,

how much i love you; no other girls comes close.
so, don't be worry ok. you would forever remain tops in this heart of mine.

yours truly,
aidiruddin.

2010-03-15T01:21:00.002+08:00

so yeaps. back from the comp.

she turned up even though she is still limping. love her alot! hees.

so yea. i'm now in the open men category. officially. no more intermediate for me. climb was great. a little too short off my goal, but yea. i think i did quite well. have to lower down my expectations. need to train more. & be much much better. 3rd. ok la. we were thinking of so many things just to get 4th and below. but it really happened and errrr, in reality, our plans does not work. lols.

so yea, since u can't turn back time, and i think it's about time i am in the open category, let's bring them down!
in about 4 more years. lol.

thanks for the support guys. the crowd drives the power inside of me. i felt what the better climbers felt. it felt great to have the crowd cheer for you. i am satisfied. and i long for the 'thunder' again. ((:

good night ppl.

2010-03-14T01:35:00.002+08:00

finals(again!) tomorrow. i really hope i could perform. but then again, there never is any chance for me to win as compared to the others, i am simply slacking and growing fat.

if i lose, then 2 months to train. but idk if i can because work is taking alot of my time away. for trainings. and you.
at times, i feel like quitting. but we all need money right?

so yea, back to tomorrow. i know climbing is something i enjoyed, but i would lie if i say i do not want to win and improve. because i believe, if i can't do this, then i can never survive in open men.
i do wish to be like those great climbers.
where i would be able to make those watching me climb sweat and get pumped together with me. i want to be able to make their hearts race when i get a grip of that last tile. i want to make them scream and shout and celebrate the moment i grab hold of the last handhold.

& i sure want to kick those foreign climbers' ass. :))

so good luck aidi for tomorrow.

bb will be resting at home(i hope). but i have a feeling we'll see her there tmr. but its ok. u need to rest.

2010-02-14T11:03:00.002+08:00

there is a loooooooooong update which i have typed, but it shall remain unpublished.

but i really think that there is no space for me to make suprises. All should be clearly stated eh. So that it will confirm happen. but nvmmmmmmmmmmm.

because i learnt, that at times like this, when i just keep quiet, kill my feelings and thoughts, everything will turn out fine.

Just like this morning, it seemed to turn out bad. On a sunday. on valentines day. on CNY.
i seemed to always miss out on those 'important' days eh.

& yesterday, i just kept quiet, and things seemed to be wonderful.

but whatever it is, today's done for, &
I shall drag myself through the whole day.
wish me luck. :/

now where is my darling that's gonna make me smile, and help me to sail through the day?

2010-02-11T01:39:00.002+08:00

foresee a situation.

i will have to kill my thoughts. kill my feelings.whatever it is.
'cause i can't lose you.

got no one else; in which i feel a part of.

on another note,
i think i am getting used to this loneliness. not being in a clique, or a group. no sense of belonging.
but it's all possible only because you're around. without you, i think i'm shit.

but i'm not complaining. i'll take it all as it comes.
i'm trying to change. Won't crap much, and let people do whatever they want to do.
even if i'm not in the wrong. been doing fine so far even though my father's being an ass.

so we'll see how far i can go about doing it aites!

stay will you.

2010-01-26T00:47:00.002+08:00

also, GET WELL SOON NURSUKASHI ERLIANA. *hugs*

only god knows how much i love you.
but then again, i think you know.

& countless times i've said, but i do feel so blessed and lucky, to have you right here with me.

2010-01-26T00:44:00.001+08:00

special update:-

someone thanked me for the support, and confesses he is an avid follower of my blog.
during holidays.
here he is, angkat king, MARK.

2010-01-15T23:51:00.001+08:00

i just want to say
GOOD LUCK to NURSUKASHI ERLIANA
for tomorrow!!

don't be nervous ok!
even though u look so cute when you're nervous. (:
*hugs*

2010-01-12T01:23:00.003+08:00

a young man wrote, for hours, paragraphs after paragraphs, only to delete it hours later.
because repeated was, how much she meant to him, of how thankful he is to have her, of how great she made his life. of how she shines brighter than the sun, and her eyes twinkles prettier than the stars. of how different she is, and how she, makes him feel.

but he realised, the countless paragraphs were mostly beautified, & could be summarised in three words, five vowels, three syllables; its simplest, yet meaningful form.

"I love you."

bb syg, i know that i am not your boyfriend, but i don't see it as an excuse for me not to love u exceptionally.
we're going to terus kahwin kan, btw. :P hee. <3

2009-12-26T02:43:00.001+08:00

don't worry.

I have eaten already. :)

2009-12-25T14:02:00.002+08:00

dear blog,

I have to get back to you because something seems wrong with Tumblr. So blog, why is it that sometimes, i just feel that nobody takes my words, opinion, or views seriously? Why is it sometimes, i felt ignored and my presence taken for granted.

that aside,
Recently, I dreamt about Afiq. Afiqhizami, that is. He was on the other side of the road, and there is a bridge. We both went up the bridge and we walked towards each other. His face, looks tired, his eyes seemed sad. Then I woke up.

Al-fateha. amin.

Recently, there has been a glitch. In me, and you. I can understand why.
& i'm surprised though, by how far you're thinking about us. :)

& i am glad. real glad that you are still here with me.

and blog, today, i am planning not to eat. someone would be working, and she would not be eating as she doesn't have cash. All because of me. So if she is not eating because of that, then I am not eating too. Say what you want readers. Call it stupidity. Call me dumb. But if she is going through the day, without a meal, then i too will not.

because with you; like i said, it's not only the happy times i wanna be with, but even the hardest, saddest, & shittiest times there is.
& we'll go through it all together.

Dear god,
please stop giving her nightmares. please make her nights peaceful, and well. please take care of her always. every single moment there is. please.

Dear you,
I am sorry. & no worries. I am always here k. I will take good care of myself, and no, I will not leave you ok. Who would? InsyaAllah. have lots of rest each time you're at home ok.
Love you bb. *hugs* <3

how relevant you are in my life & i, in yours; they don't have a clue of.

2009-12-24T05:59:00.002+08:00

the lack of entry, of posts, is not because i am lazy to update, nor do i haven't anything to say about life; about you.

but it's just that no matter how hard i tried, no matter how hard i squeezed my brains, my wits,

I just couldn't come up with a poem, a paragraph, a sentence nor a word, that would be sooooooo beautiful, that would be comparable to how you had made my life: so fun, so meaningful,
so blessed.

'til next time.

2009-12-21T00:00:00.001+08:00

would be overnighting.

not sure if you will be joining us at zaini's bbq.

if you are tired syg, just go home and rest k.

so i will be able to meet you during training later. weee.

'cause i'm sure right now, every inch of me would be calling out for you,
and screaming how much they have missed you.

love u b.

yes!!

2009-12-20T00:00:00.002+08:00

tmr will be the last night i will be away from you.

& on monday, we would meet. and that is all i would want to do.

to see you, the person who i have missed so much and not used to being apart for so long.

and i would go for training, and see you there.

I can't wait!

btw, get some rest ya bby. you will be working later, till so late.
make sure to have your rest k.

call me after work! <3

missing you dearly.

2009-12-19T00:00:00.003+08:00

yesterday was the last night of the chalet with my class.

now, i will be at changi (i think). for the chalet with my family.

right now,

I will be missing you, so very much,
that i would do anything just to see your face, you smiling at me,and hugging me tight.

oh b, do get some rest k.
the coming weekends is gonna need lots of energy for you. ;)

jgn naughty2 k.
i trust you~ *points* hee.

i miss you.

love u bb.

why don't you come over? i want to show them the girl whom i have madly fell in love with.

2009-12-18T00:00:00.000+08:00

2nd day,

maybe we would chill, and talk, and laugh and have fun;

I am sure at the back of my head, i am thinking of you.
every single moment. every single smile. every single chuckle.

every single blink of the eye.

I miss you nursukashi erliana. <3

(:

2009-12-17T00:00:00.001+08:00

first day i'm at chalet.

I am sure i will be thinking of you this very moment, not being able to hear your voice in the wee hours of the morning.

i miss you bb.

2009-12-16T14:18:00.001+08:00

i am going now bb.

call me if anything happened k.

love u.

i am sure i will miss you.
<3
*hugs*mmmmuacks.
hee.

2009-11-20T00:02:00.000+08:00

was surfing through the net, and found this.
she would love to have this treat.

p.s. we shall do it one day k.

2009-11-19T19:31:00.000+08:00

my tumblr says it all.

talk soon please.

2009-11-17T21:02:00.002+08:00

"i told myself, "If I can't do this, then i got no chances to be."

nothing beats the feeling of you calling me,"dearest".
nothing beats the feeling of you calling me,"B".
nothing beats the feeling of you calling me,"sayang'".
& nothing will beat the feeling of you calling me; "my Aidi".

...."

b, i am trying my best, so keep taking my hand & guide me along.

uu.

2009-11-13T00:39:00.003+08:00

worried sick.

dear sukashi,

are u ok? your phone is off. it's seldom off.
i called and it's voicemails. sms unreplied.
b, i hope u are fine. please call me back soon.
because right now, i can't sleep, can't eat, can't do anything.
i can feel, beatings of my heart, in my head.

all i want is to hear from you that you are fine.
or at least hear from you, and be by your side.

dear god,
protect her from any harm please.
thank u.
amin.

worry. b, tc of urselffff. :(

2009-11-08T01:29:00.000+08:00

sukashi=♥

p.s. i♥u,b.

2009-10-30T12:15:00.003+08:00

i just woke up.

yes, i accidentally(not on purpose) slept.

actually, i don't feel like going to school from the very first time i opened my eyes today.

Lazy? Maybe. tired? don't think so.

but in my head, all i could think of was to be by your side today, and nowhere else.
not even class.

& this shoulder of mine is starting to bug me. like seriously.

reminder: physio at 5 today.

I wish they could just jab my shoulder with some anaesthetics for sunday, and for rock on.
i wish.

but i guess it's a good thing though. time for me to rest?
see you guys in a month or two.
beware. ;)

nowhere i want to be, but by ur side. especially at times like this, i never wants you to be alone. never.

2009-10-28T10:26:00.003+08:00

dear lessthanthree,

Please take care of yourself while you are at home. Call me if you feel uneasy, or even a bit of pain. Even a tiny weeny little bit of pain like a prick of a needle. Even when you are bored, even when you just want to say a tiny little bit of thing, feel free to call me.

Please, please, please take care of yourself. This includes taking your medicine, sleep when you are tired & eating your normal lunch & dinner.

I really hope you are okay by yourself. Call me k if anything happens.
Take good care of yourself.

I'm here k. Always.

<3 u.

yours sincerely,

Me. ((:

2009-10-26T13:12:00.009+08:00

by right, this would have been the downside of my life.

the worst days ever so far.

injured shoulder, can't train & climb. no comps. no carnivals.

body feels weak.

hot hot hot.

itches all over.

swelling. here and there.

Yes, my life right now could be considered unlucky, sucky, and bad.

but for all these negatives, God made three things present in my life.

these three things, were more than enough to make up for any bad events that happened in my life. were enough to pick me up when i fall. enough to give me company when i am lonely. enough to carve a smile on my face. enough to make me laugh out loud.

enough to make me feel,

complete. & happy.

the three things people call "Love, Care & Concern."

But I know them as,

"Nursukashi Erliana"

you, my dear, have been a blessing in my life.

2009-10-15T23:29:00.005+08:00

for you, girl,

i would like to be an endless summer, so i could give you warmth, keep the cold away, the whole year round.

i would like to be a mutant, able to absorb all the pain away from you, make you feel so fine, so very fine.

i would like to be a strong kevlar shell, to take care of you, where you could take refuge & shelter, keeping you safe & sound.

[& also]

i would like to be a romantic, able to steal your heart, make you feel loved & happy, able to make you mine, only mine.

‘cause you girl, you mean so much to me. so much. to me.

& i don't want u to suffer, any form of pain, and for that sweetest smile, to be ever-present on your face.

2009-10-12T23:51:00.002+08:00

get well soon k uuuu~

<3

2009-10-11T18:22:00.004+08:00

maybe yes, last time u were more lovey-dovey, & soft so as to say.

i would lie if i were to say i wouldn't want you to be like before.

but hey! who cares. there is no need for u to try to change back.

because the present you is the one i fell in love with. :))

kk. mandi!
byeeee~

p.s. kalau nk tuka pon bole ar~ hees.

2009-10-11T01:47:00.003+08:00

& yesterday, i dreamt of u.
it's a wonder how i could remember. every single detail of it.
& how i wish this memory could be used for studying. LOLS.
typing it out would be messy, but i shall; just in case i suffer memory loss.

but yes, i had a dream of u.

& in this dream, there was u, and me.

we were sitting by the beach. yes, the beach.
and the horizon was in sight. the trees were dancing to the rhythm of the breeze.
the sun was shining brightly, but not scorching, the heat feeling oh-so-nice.

& u, sitting right beside me, and our hands held each other, fingers interlocking.
i kept looking at you, your eyes, how beautiful u were, even with your hair blown by the breeze.

then there was a loud sound. we faced forward, & a wave came towards our direction. it moved us a bit. but we were still together, holding firmly.

then from a far, a bigger wave kept coming in, and it hit us, this time, the impact was stronger.

the sky turns grey, and the rain came pouring down.
lightning and thunder were present short after.

wave after wave, the impact greater and the waves coming in faster, with each incoming one.
till it felt like we were hit by a chain of waves.

the waves send us drifting away, and it felt hard, hard to keep holding your hand tight.
it seemed like the waves were trying to pull us apart, and it kept on coming, and coming.

soon after, it felt tiring, my arms were pumped out, and i am exhausted.
i could feel. i could feel ur hand, slipping out, as my grip loosens.

i kept holding tight, no matter how tired i am.

the waves kept crashing and crashing,
& luckily, right before my hands gave way,
the waves calm down.

the clouds moves away, and we, me and u, laid on our back, facing the clear sky.
the tree, dancing once again.
and a rainbow, was present.

then i turned to my side, looking at you, smiling.

the smile, was more than enough, to replenish my strength,
and it makes me feel that all,
was worth it.

i lie closer to u,
i held u close,
i held u tight,

*then i woke up!*

my mom asked me to wake up. sheesh! LOLS.
it seems a little bit far-fetched. but it was a dream yo!
and it's told part by part. every single point.
100% guarantee, plus chop!

haha.

in summary, i knew what it meant.
its not going to be easy. lots of things is gonna happen. all i have to do is to be strong, & hold on.

but in life, it ain't so easy. nothing is confirmed. but me,
i'll take the risk yo!
'cause your smile, your eyes, i can't live without. :))

haha! yes yes. that is all. haha.

till next time! toodles.

& i won't stop clapping, 'cause i knew this is what i wanted. :)

2009-10-06T23:30:00.007+08:00

IF I WERE TO FALL IN LOVE
Author: Ed Walter

If I were to fall in love,
It would have to be with you.
Your eyes, your smile,
The way you laugh,
The things you say and do.
Take me to the places,
My heart never knew.
So, if I were to fall in love,
It would have to be with you.

If I were to give my heart,
It would have to be to you,
For you bring things into my life,
So beautiful and new.
Love, so soft and warm beside me,
That I know it’s true,
If I were to give my heart,
It would have to be to you.

I was looking for an answer.
I was looking for a way.
To keep the magic that you bring,
To each and every day.
To live our lives together,
As only lovers do.
It started with a feeling,
And every day it grew,
So, when I knew I was in love,
It had to be with you.

i am sorry for feeling down, but "even the best falls down sometimes." :))

2009-09-29T23:57:00.003+08:00

my post may be short.
but there is nothing else i want to tell the world right now. except;
that i am happy, to have her in my life, around me, by my side.
that i am happy, to have her, in my heart.

thank you God.

stay, will you? i know i will. :)

2009-09-26T19:57:00.006+08:00

8 drawn flowers for her.

to negate the problems she faced, & in hope to make her smile.

& not feel frust nor anything that is simply, not happy.

flowers for;
the ropeburn, the pain little toes, the headache, the ulcers, the angst, the stomache, the laze. :D

one flower each.

ouh. one more?
that's from me to her,

for the times she spent with me. :))

you.<3

2009-09-26T05:51:00.002+08:00

but once again, i had a feeling someone ain't sleeping. :/

but if she ain't calling me, she don't want to menyusahkan me.
but i've never felt that way before. never will.

but, if my feeling is wrong, calling her may wake her up.
but i don't want that. i want her to rest.

but(last)! i have a strong, strong, strong feeling she's not sleeping. :/

& if you aren't sleeping, oh dear lessthanthree; take care of yourself k.

i will always be there, by your side. cross my heart.

2009-09-26T02:56:00.003+08:00

& after she is sound asleep (i'm sure of it. 1 hour of silence. LOL!), then i shall be able to sleep.

but shall blog first.

training had been great. i can still climb though, but i just ain't satisfied. I don't train. train like those train type of train. do sets. physical and stuffs. idk. i shall chill for now. plan properly first, & then embark on the journey of killing myself.

&! the guys laughed at me when i asked whether the job zai mentioned had CPF or not. i'm serious k. tskkk. haha.

& she? haha. she's fine. and right now, she had become very, very significant in my life. significant much. very much. & what's inside of me, it's growing stronger, and stronger. i'm sure of it.very sure. she's a wonder. ;)
with her, i cukai-ed alot. but idk why. actually, she's the first i had ever cukai-ed. idk why. but it's fun that way? haha. so she won't get bored with me? hahaha!

& i lessthanthree her.
a lot.

OH! tomorrow!
i gotta be early!!

she's not coming. she's going out with her family. kesian her. kena scold just now. sorry!

but ok what. she's going out with her family. i have been like around her for sooooooooo many days. actually like every moment. later she jelak how? tsk tsk. haha. but its not that way for me.never have been. but i do hope she feels that way too.
it's like,
without U, it won't be aidirUddin. *cukai*

&, how can u ever be jelak-ed of that pretty face & smile of hers? *cukai again* hee.

yes yes! tmr! 1 o'clock at boon lay!
shall not be late! i shall try!

ouh! sorry fatin for that day! :))

nites world!! been a long time since i longwinded on my blog rite? haha! my viewership rating is going down man. haha.
i shall try to cater to the masses.
but first prorities goes to u, lessthanthree. :)))

nites world!
have a great day ahead!

& i want to be the entity, that you would be sure of; that will be present always by your side.always.

2009-09-20T01:30:00.002+08:00

selamat hari raya!!! :D

maaf zahir dan batin.

they say, the higher u fly, the harder u fall. but with u, i am not scared. not scared to fly higher and higher. 'cause i know, if i ever fall, u will be there, to catch me. to prevent the fall, or at least to break the fall. i think u would not even let me fall in the first place. i believe so. :)

2009-09-19T02:49:00.005+08:00

a flower do not bloom in a day.

i will keep on watering, give it sunlight & care;
never will i grow tired of doing the above.

with time, when it is bloomed & ready,
i will pluck it gently,
and place it in my pocket, all safe and secure,
near to the heart.

& i will take care of it, forever will it be mine.
insyaAllah.

the flower of your love.

(:

& i will hold on tight, tighter than how i would hold on for my life.

2009-09-13T00:33:00.003+08:00

right now, he can feel it grow. stronger.
& how significant she has become; to him, in his life.

without the heat, it wouldn't be the sun.
like how without the water, it wouldn't be the sea.
without your smile & laughter, it wouldn't be fun.
like how without you, it wouldn't be me.

uu. *smiles* gotta get-get.

2009-09-09T01:02:00.001+08:00

(: ♥ :)

more, what more? i lessthanthree u more, that is.

2009-09-07T00:20:00.002+08:00

i could live, just by seeing u smile at me.

pretty, pretty. uu, ape colour die lagi? GOLD eh? :))

2009-09-06T06:03:00.008+08:00

I want to be the best.
I want to be number 1.

No, i'm not referring to climbing.

But to be tops.
in your heart.

I really do.

this hand i'm reaching out, hold it tight forever; will you?

-------------------------------

From: Wednesday, August 19, 2009 , 12:17 AM

how do i tell you,
that you are special to me?
way different, you're like no other.

how do i express,
i want you to stay?
in times of joy, & even moments of tears.

how can i let you know,
i want you to be by my side?
for present & god's will, 'til forever more.

is it alright if i were just to say,
"i lessthanthree[edited] you, fine young lady"?

'cause he wants her to stay.
& not go away.
it felt different when they're apart.
he decided, he wants to, give her his heart.

what i felt in my heart when i wrote the above passage, it grew much.

It is now a zilli♥n times more.

2009-09-05T02:24:00.008+08:00

& as i look at you girl,
in my head; three words.

i,
lessthanthree,
you.

"Someday I will turn you to be everyone's dream guy." she said. but all i want was to be hers.
can i be yours?

2009-09-02T06:09:00.003+08:00

& as these eyes of mine closes, you vividly stayed in my sight. smiling.

come along, fine young lady. take my hand, let's go through it all together. :)

2009-09-01T22:54:00.003+08:00

as i close my eyes & hugged my bolster tight,
nothing else is on my mind but you.

yes, you, fine young lady.

you.

be a constant in my life, will u?

2009-08-30T14:26:00.002+08:00

there is nothing else i want right now, but for her to be fine.

it sure feels sucky when the one u care about is going through hell & all you could do was to look & smile to try make her feel better.
these hands of mine, keep holding them will u; and never will it grew tired of yours.

2009-08-30T01:05:00.003+08:00

Dear you,

i liked it when you are by my side. in fact, i loved it.
& i would want you to stay; for a long time, no. stay forever.
So, that is why we must take good care of your health k;
& we would be able to,
seize the day.
together.

yours sincerely,
aidiruddin.

whispered, was the 3-word.
& i don't think u heard it. :)

:) lessthanthree (:

2009-08-29T03:06:00.006+08:00

& tonight, i will sleep oh-so-comfortably,
your presence feels so real, so super real.
When i closed my eyes, i could see you smiling,
with that fragrance of yours which strongly linger around(nari special siket).
It feels like you were right here with me,
right here by my side.

& this tells me,
yes, you are the one;
the one i lessthanthree.

2009-08-28T03:50:00.003+08:00

I want to be just like a star.

Personally, i like stars.

Stars, even though they are small, they do shine brightly in the vast and dark sky.
Stars help people to be calm; just by watching the stars shine in the night.
Stars makes people feel safe, and protected.
People look for stars when they are lost, and the stars helps them find their way back.
People tell stars of their wish, and the stars would make their wishes come true.
Stars watches over them during their sleep, making sure, they are safe and sound.

& i want to be the star,
which shines brightly in your eyes.
i do.

just so you know, i am here.
to stay.

2009-08-27T05:15:00.001+08:00

you, (:

2009-08-27T01:32:00.001+08:00

happy birthday fiqah!

enjoy the chalkbag!
keep climbing.
ALLER.

p.s. HELLO SYUKRI!

2009-08-26T05:27:00.002+08:00

time to sleep. need to go training later.

(:

& like the stars i want to be,
to be able to watch over you,
even in the darkest of times.

2009-08-24T01:55:00.003+08:00

You say, "I am not as pretty as her."

& I will say, "Physical beauty captures nothing but only the fleeting eyes. More is required to capture the rooted heart. & you got mine."

2009-08-23T16:30:00.004+08:00

dear fine young lady.
never i want to be,

the reason for the absence of your smile.

(:
*thumbs up*

2009-08-22T15:46:00.003+08:00

& i would write a sticky note wish,
of standing strong by your side.
being your pillar of strength & support.

2009-08-19T00:17:00.002+08:00

how do i tell you,
that you are special to me?
way different, you're like no other.

how do i express,
i want you to stay?
in times of joy, & even moments of tears.

how can i let you know,
i want you to be by my side?
for present & god's will, 'til forever more.

is it alright if i were just to say,
"i ___ you, fine young lady"?

'cause he wants her to stay.
& not go away.
it felt different when they're apart.
he decided, he wants to, give her his heart.

2009-08-18T00:19:00.004+08:00

he gave her.
not only with the intention to make her day,
but to tell her, she's appreciated.
in his life.

ok! time to sleep. tmr, wakie wakie! :D

sorry if it's not great. he's just bad at this.
but he wants to, to be able to make her smile,
every single moment, even when at her down-est.

2009-08-16T04:17:00.001+08:00

though these words may not be spoken, he wants her to know that,

she's different.
she's exceptional.
she's special.

& every night, right before he sleeps, she never failed to be present in his thoughts.

lessthanthree. :)

2009-08-15T02:04:00.000+08:00

smiles.

2009-08-14T11:46:00.001+08:00

okok. now, must update on other things.

if not syahirah would come talk to me & ask why i am emo. :D

so right now,

let's go!

aim for the world!!

train train train.

world world world!

=)

2009-08-13T22:18:00.002+08:00

the environment is getting fine.
it felt much comfortable.
thank god.

&
he don't know whether he is supposed to be saying this.
but he misses her.

i miss u.

2009-08-13T11:31:00.003+08:00

double choc.
white chip.
peanut butter.
ice cream.
coke.

NICE.

2009-08-13T01:40:00.003+08:00

i really, really wonder.

how were you able to be etched deep,
deep inside my thoughts.
& even my heart.

how i hope you would not bear the pain alone.
how i hope you make me worry.
instead of enduring it all.
by yourself.

it's not your fault that i am worrying.
for it is my choice.
for i choose to care.
& be by your side.

i decide.cross my heart.

2009-08-12T03:11:00.002+08:00

god! god! god!

please please please protect her.

take the pain away from her.
give it to me, if u must.
please.

bloody bad receptions. voicemails.
omg.

damndamndamn! argh. :((((((

2009-08-12T01:27:00.002+08:00

& with her around,
none other he wanted,
but to see her smile.

& when their hands intertwined,
he wants time to stop,
make the moment forever.

& with every moment spent,
it grew; with him,
falling deeper.

for her.

2009-08-11T01:08:00.001+08:00

it's no wonder i could end each day with a smile on my face.
because my days always ends with you.

& thats something which i hope will be a norm in my life.

you.

2009-08-10T14:40:00.002+08:00

mission: _________, failed. at 1438 hours.

so what now?

physical time. toodles. haha.
:)

2009-08-10T01:38:00.001+08:00

i am.
grateful for what i have.

for the life i'm living, though it may not be the best, but it is flowing quite smoothly.
very smoothly. compared to some others' lives.

i thank god.
for with me i have
my family.
my friends.
my climbers.
& you.

its not ur fault. u tried, and it is all that mattered.
to me, you were a great friend to him. the greatest he can find.
and don't be disappointed because it is all written.
& now, in my eyes, you are getting pretty.
prettier not only physically,
but with a beautiful soul as well.

k. gtg, meeting the others!

2009-08-09T02:57:00.003+08:00

& when he sees her in pain, he was oh-so-worried.
worst still, he wasn't able to let her hold his hand.
to help ease the pain she's enduring.
to make her feel all better and smile.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

with her, it felt different. none he ever encounter.
with her, everything felt peaceful, as peaceful a dove.
with her, he wants to take care of, now & forever.
with her, he fell deep; deeply. in _____.

2009-08-08T02:07:00.005+08:00

in a vast field. trapped all around.

left alone. all alone. there was no company. in an empty state of mind.
the feeling was different. when the crowd seems to be absent.
alone, no company.
or that was what he thought.

sitting in the silence, he realised.

he was not alone.

there was always the air.
Even though it could not be seen, it had always been there.
it was with him always. always.
it was there, crucial for his survival. Without the air, he would
DIE.

& past flew a butterfly.
it made him felt a certain feeling in the heart and it made him smile.
He was not sure whether he could catch it, and hold it in his hands.
He was scared if he were to attempt to catch it directly, it would flew far away.
he would not be able to see it then.
Even though the butterfly just flew around,
he was happy that it was nearby, & clearly visible to him.
seeing it makes him; happy.
So, he just sat, spread his hands wide open.
hoping that the butterfly would slowly settle down on his palm.
& he would have it with him, till forever.

figure of speech. for you to
figure it out. haha.

nites.

how much i wish i could tell you that i, :)

2009-08-07T17:01:00.001+08:00

two things.

1. Everything feels different.
2. I just can't seem to do anything right.

:/

2009-08-06T09:56:00.001+08:00

look at the time.

& things were already not going well.
i got a feeling. that it ain't gonna be my day.
haiz.

but i do have to smile don't i?

2009-08-06T00:22:00.004+08:00

it takes two hands to clap.

but what happens if there were only one?
it will be used. to slap. my face.
to wake up & get back to reality.

but i told myself. that ain't matter.
as long as i, could be the listening ear,
as long as i, could catch her if she falls,
as long as i, could be there for her to lean on,
as long as i, could just care for her.

going against the odds that stacked up high against me.
taking advantage of that small itsy bitsy teeny weeny bit of chance.
testing the endurance & strength of faith and hope.

let's leave it up to fate.
'cause there is no such thing as coincidence.

i decided.

2009-08-04T05:34:00.003+08:00

i can't sleep, so here i am.

never have i been worried to this extent.
i'm amused at how u were able to make me so worried.
it's not your fault. & i'm not complaining. :)

i know. aidi kental kan.

2009-08-04T01:06:00.002+08:00

well, i do need pointers.

on the flow of things in this little world.
how some moments were fast, and at times seemed slow.
certain path seems straight, and others were curled.
this moment were friends, another minute foe.
the world operates;i could not understand how.how fast things can change.

the fine line between, a thread so very fine.
the thread between, sweet little friendship or more.
the thread would cut, did it ever crossed your mind?
a cut so deep,will leave u battered and sore.
how can we know, which is which. so we would not be cut if it were not meant to be.

pointers in life, on the purpose we're here.
on trying to figure out, coming up with a goal to meet.
and sometimes we tried hard, and when we get so near,
left us sad, it would; realising it was all a skit.
feelings and thoughts occurs. but we aint no mind reader.

have you ever felt, when none other seemed to matter,
be it something u want, or something unexpected.
for a figure to be all smiles and full of laughter.
you would leave all behind, and yes, nothing else mattered.
of trying to be there.but right now, i feel useless.

daily rants. about the thoughts that would be accepted nowhere. rants about how i thought inside. rants about the noises made by the heart. rants about, all those i just can't seem to say.

rants about.you.

2009-08-01T02:04:00.001+08:00

i am gonna sleep. and hope i wake up tomorrow, with the power to absorb pain.

'cause i would be your iron maiden.

the heart sure is talkative nowadays.

2009-07-31T01:54:00.003+08:00

today, i was weak.

one small meal to last a whole day.
but now, i got power! i'm recharged!! can make noise already!! wooo! but tomorrow, I will have to wake up early, so I have to sleep. :D

I will use all my energy and try to make me sleep. :P

haha! nites all!

right now, i just wish i had the power to absorb pain from others.

2009-07-29T22:42:00.000+08:00

climbing is life.
but life is not climbing.

remember this k aidi.
remember.

akustatik. :))

2009-07-28T10:51:00.000+08:00

train train train.

strong strong strong.

world world world.

2009-07-28T01:57:00.002+08:00

i like to see them.

smiles, i mean. it made me kind of happy seeing smiles. it made me feel that life is present on earth. it made me feel great. it highlights the good happenings of the day. it drives away sorrows. it is like the; greatest drug, and the most effective medicine of all.
smiles means a lot to me.

especially yours.

in the rainbow, a certain colour is slowly fading away, but a new colour seemed to be shining through. idk why. :/

damn blog. now idk how to put colours and beautify my blog. sheesh. haha.

but nvm. now, i am tired. lol.

nites!! :D

2009-07-25T01:35:00.003+08:00

I, Muhammad Aidiruddin, am very tired. I think that my sleep debt is building up, and my grades are getting worse. I am late for school every single day, and I can do nothing except climb. & my climbing is not that good though. My ankles have been bad for a few months and it is hurting right now. And Rocka is just a few days away.

In other words, I, Muhammad Aidiruddin, is in deep shit.

BUT,

I still smile. :)

'cause i don't like ruining other people's day
& by smiling, i made mine fun too!

haha.

nites ppl! woo~!

some thoughts and a certain feeling.

2009-07-24T01:48:00.002+08:00

i am very tired. mentally. and my sleep debt is building up. zzzzzz.

need to rest/sleep more.

i can feel it shift.

2009-07-22T02:57:00.000+08:00

haha! blogger is being irritating right now.

will update soon! :D

2009-07-20T02:17:00.002+08:00

fee fie fo fum.
i now have with me a talking watch. no.

not C-watch. it is a simple talking watch. cool shit, i say.

it goes, "*ding!* (says time) am/pm."

woooooo~! and even though it has only been less than one day, i have been pressing it countless of times. hahahahaha~

its a simple watch. but i like it. :))

ah. and maybe, i should start training. zzz.

*presses again* hee~

nites ppl!

2009-07-19T04:19:00.002+08:00

woke up at 6! haha.

need to rest. training is gonna start back. zzzzzz.
den i will be needing to sleep early. and no more late night snacks.

i just ate 2 full meals. i am not supposed to do that. nvm. it will be the last.

woooo~!

nites/morning ppl. :))

2009-07-18T04:34:00.003+08:00

from the way things are right now, I would be needing at least a 2 days rest. complete rest.
shagged beyond shag. tired beyond tire. exhausted beyond exhaustion.

actually, NO. haha! i am not like tired like 'urgh' kind of tired, but more to a sleepy kind of tired.

I just think that i have a sleep debt to be paid back, and it will all be settled these weekend. :D

anything, just reach me on my phone. if you need anybody to talk to, yes, go ahead. call or msg would be fine.
anything troubling you, just want to talk crap, yes. all acceptable.
as long as you need a listening ear, i am here. for anybody.
yes, for you too. :)

random thoughts:-

because after every storm, there will always be a rainbow.
what i want is not a period, but a lifetime. (if you know what i mean)
what would you do if a dog bit you?
sexciting pickup lines.
tired.
system is ringing in my ears.
ICT700
sleep
sleep
sleep
sleep
sleep
sleep(okok. i know you guys got the idea. lol.)

Hahaha. thanks for reading! Although the update had nothing much today.
but do one thing for me. If you are reading this, smile.
yes.
thank you.

ok. cannot tahan already. the eyelid part of my eye is like hurting. this is no joke. seriously. :S

nites ppl! :D

2009-07-17T01:45:00.000+08:00

idk why. but i like this! LOLS.

2009-07-17T01:33:00.003+08:00

Today, I was kidnapped by a terrorist on the way to school.

I do not know aniting except the fact that I woke up by the roadside. I couldn't even remember the terrorist's face.

As I lay dazzled by the incident, I went home and got on the net, and I saw pictures of 'me' going to school. I realised that the terrorist had got the same features as me. only that i am much *eyebrow up and down*.

The purpose of this entry is that if 'I' was with you today, and 'I' did aniting, I am sorry. The terrorist disguised as Aidiruddin and went to school and stuffs.

I would appreciate it if you guys have any information on him.
THANK YOU.
your help is greatly appreciated.

2009-07-16T01:41:00.005+08:00

Hello people!

A certain friend of mine had just spoken(chat) to me and I think i felt it too.
I am different. I will try to be who I used to be, and insyaAllah, it will all go well. :D

OH! in case you guys are wondering who my dear friend is, here is a hint:-
she is a chipmunk who had the gigi-est teeth of them all.

YES! you got it right!
She goes by the name of Syahirah. Yes yes.

Brief description of her below.

YES! The shine in her teeth is inevitable and you guys won't miss it. Do not worry. She claims that my teeth is much more silau but i think that mine is just cleaner so it reflects all her light back to her.

Like the image displayed below:-

Like the sun and the moon. Me, like the moon, just reflect the SHINE from the sun. :D

And if the shine is bothering you guys, no worries. There is a new product called, "Shine-no-more". It will be in stores spring next year.

This product covers the shine and keeps the light inside the fabric. Wonderfully amazing.

A picture to prove it:-

Yes, the red fabric is the product. Works wonderfully isn't it?

Ohdamn. I was suppose to blog about something that could make a person smile or laugh or even a smirk.

but it looks nothing like it and its more to a saketkanhatiorang kind of post.

ah. i screwed big time.purposely. LOLS!

sorry. :D

nites ppl. :))

2009-07-15T02:36:00.003+08:00

It felt as if you were close but when i wanted to get a hold of you, I just can't seem to reach.

But, I had this feeling inside of the heart. Of something is happening, under these nose; right in front of these gullible eyes, of mine.
Not in the favour of me.

Dreaming, I shall keep.

'cause in your eyes, I am nothing more but just a mere highranker.
'cause in your mind, I am just the shadow that lingers at the back of your head.
'cause in your heart, I am insignificant. No, I'm not even there.

& if these were read and shall hope if it wasn't true, then gestures of assurance would greatly be appreciated.